Dad’s tribute to his sister
October 17th, 2008 by Kathy
At Aunt Ruth’s memorial service, my father shared the following tribute to his older sister:
A TRIBUTE TO RUTH STRATTON
Delivered at the Memorial Service in her honor on October 11, 2008
Gilmore Park United Church
Richmond, B.C.
We thank all of you for coming—on a busy and beautiful holiday weekend—to honor the memory of Ruth Stratton. Welcome Ruth’s Air Canada colleagues, members here at Gilmore Park, friends from St. John’s Richmond and St. John’s Shaughnessy and others of Ruth’s friends from the community. I’m Dave Partridge, Ruth’s only sibling and little brother. Chatting one evening last August during dinner in Vancouver’s beautiful Stanley Park, Ruth and I were reminiscing about our years of traveling, places we had seen, experiences we had enjoyed, our careers and our families. Near the conclusion of that conversation, Ruth smiled and said, “It’s been a good life. And I’ll take this latest challenge, be positive and make the best of it.†And she did.
The challenge was a malignant brain tumor. It first manifested itself in June with some minor speech problems just about the time she and her good friend Gladys Lund were planning an automobile trip to Alberta. They took that trip and shortly thereafter the brain tumor diagnosis was confirmed and radiation treatments began to shrink the tumor. Ruth’s speech problems cleared up and by the time of my visit in early August, she was enjoying some good days. But the doctor told her she could expect to have perhaps only a few months, maybe a year to live. As it turned out, she had less than two months.
But in those two months, she had some happy experiences: including a dinner with several of her travel industry colleagues which her good friend Marilyn Byfield arranged. Ruth met her challenge and remained positive.
It was Ruth’s nature to be positive. So she had lots of friends around the world. One of her longtime and closest friends came a long way to be with us today: Jane Mills from England. Another close friend, Pat Collins from Toronto, is unable to be here.
Ruth regarded herself as particularly fortunate because she had two families. The first was the family in which she and I grew up in—the Partridge family of Hamilton, Ontario, with relatives in Toronto as well. Now, it includes my wife, Betty, along with our daughter Laura (who is here today), her husband, Sam, and three children—all of us in South Carolina– and our daughter Kathy, husband, Lars, and two daughters in Texas who visited their Aunt Ruth just two weeks before she died. Kathy and Lars are expecting a third daughter whose middle name—they have decided—will be Ruth! And she could be born on Ruth’s birthday, November 7th.
Ruth also had a second family whom she called her “Richmond family.†Marguerite Love and Ruth met in 1955 as new employees of Air Canada (or TransCanada Airlines as it was then called). They have been close friends ever since—supporting each other through many of life’s experiences, including the death of Marguerite’s first husband, Bob Love, and her marriage twelve years ago to Jack Raine. Ruth’s “Richmond family†includes Marguerite and Jack and Marguerite’s two children: Sean and his wife Penny and three sons and Maureen, husband Xavier, three sons and a daughter. I am grateful for the love and care this family has bestowed upon my sister for so many years.
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No one knew Ruth better than Marguerite and no two friends could be more devoted to each other. So it was appropriate that Marguerite, Jack and Sean were with Ruth when she died shortly after noon a week ago Wednesday, October 1st.
While we were making arrangements for this memorial service, I asked Marguerite to give me her words to describe Ruth. She had many and, without hesitation, she said, “Ruth was so loving and thoughtful, always putting everyone else ahead of herself. She was a true friend.â€
In the days since Ruth’s death, Marguerite has received dozens of emails. Here are a few of the words and comments which friends and family members have sent to describe Ruth: good, caring, fun to be with, a great friend, helpful, kind, gentle, generous, always available when needed, intuitive, gracious. She had integrity and was loyal. “I was fortunate to have known Ruth,†said one email writer. “Her memory will be a blessing.â€
Talk about memories! Those of us who were on her Christmas card list will always remember that beautiful picture—carefully selected by Ruth each year from among the many she took on her trips. Her last, was that provocative photo of an old Chinese man and a young Chinese boy which she took on a trip to China a year ago with Marguerite and Jack and which she sent last December. Photography was one of Ruth’s hobbies, indeed a passion. From the time of her first international trip in 1953 to the coronation of Queen Elizabeth until her last camping trip with Marguerite and Jack just a month ago, Ruth loved to document her travels and friendships with photos.
She also enjoyed woodworking and sports. In her younger days, she was an athlete, just like our father who played football for the Hamilton Tigers in the 1920s. Ruth was proud of her dad. Some of you may have noticed his Tiger ring which she often wore.
Ruth also loved music. She sang during her teen years in the Grace United Church choir in Hamilton. And she loved symphony orchestras, especially the concerts of Vancouver Symphony. She’s the one who introduced me to classical music. Ruth was a good big sister and she had so much influence, she even had me listening to those Saturday afternoon Texaco-sponsored Metropolitan Opera broadcasts when I was still a young boy. She was also a good daughter—caring for and taking our Mum on many wonderful trips over Mum’s three decades of widowhood.
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Ruth loved the travel industry and her thirty-six years at Air Canada before retiring in 1991. She also enjoyed mentoring young women entering the industry and the opportunity to play a role in developing and documenting the efforts of the travel organizations of which she was a member and for which she worked so hard: B.C. Women and Travel, Vancouver Women and Travel, and the International Federation of Women’s Travel Organizations.
In that long list of words describing Ruth, I did not see organized. Well, she was! Whether it was preparing a dinner for guests, documenting travel club histories, making out a shopping list, organizing an event or trip, Ruth was the ultimate planner: precise, detail-oriented, thorough. But nobody’s perfect!!
Many years ago, Ruth & I hooked up in St. Paul, Minnesota at one of those IFTWO conferences. Since we both loved baseball, Ruth said she would buy tickets for us and one of her friends to see a Minnesota Twins game.
Come game day, we met at her hotel in St. Paul and headed by city bus for Minneapolis. Not long before the bus reached the interstate for the ride between the twin cities, I began to wonder if Ruth had remembered the tickets. But, given her planning skills I thought: I know Ruth. If I dare ask her, she’ll give me one of those irritated, “trust me†looks. She’ll be insulted and I’ll feel bad. But I couldn’t help myself. So I finally worked up the courage, glanced at her, and as nonchalantly as possible, asked, “You have the tickets?†She bolted straight up, almost ran down the aisle and told the bus driver, “We must get off the bus!†We did, and being several years younger than my sister, I was appointed to run back to the hotel. I found those tickets right where she said they would be…in her other purse! And yes, we did get to the game.
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Ruth’s last couple of years were not easy. She had that bout with lung cancer last year. Then shortly after radiation treatments, she flew to Denver for my daughter Laura’s son’s wedding. Then in August of last year, some of our family were in Hamilton for our cousin—Bob Partridge’s—wedding. Before the wedding, Marguerite, Pat Collins, Ruth, Betty and I, Laura, her girls, and Lindsey’s fiancé, Rob, met for lunch in Hamilton. It was the last time we were all together—and it was at this same hour—fourteen months ago today.
My family and I—along with Marguerite and her family—appreciate your sharing this memorial service with us. Your presence has eased and comforted our sorrow. After Ruth’s Godson, Sean Love, has shared some scripture and his thoughts with us, we hope you will join us for a time of fellowship at the reception.
Ruth would be grateful for your presence as well. She would be humbled—perhaps a bit embarrassed—by all the kind words and attention but she would not want us to be sad. As she told me that evening two months ago at the Tea House in Stanley Park, she appreciated the life filled with wonderful friends and colleagues and the variety of experiences God had given her.
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Intended or not, we all leave a legacy. As the comments in so many phone calls and emails have indicated, my sister’s legacy, I suppose, is the good example of why it is important to be interested in and care for others and of what it means to be a true friend.
In one of several emails which Marguerite forwarded to us, my wife, Betty, found one extraordinary thought which she suggested I might want to include in this tribute. I agreed because it is beautiful and appropriate. It came from Ruth’s friend, Lynn Hamilton, in Milwaukee. Said Lynn, “Someday we can remember Ruth not with tears in our eyes, but with laughter in our hearts.†Ladies and gentlemen, let us not be sad for too long. Let us, instead, experience peace, encouragement and determination in our own lives by remembering Ruth with laughter and appreciation in our hearts.
My Aunt Ruth, my father’s sister, was always a lovely and fun person to talk to and be around. Even though we lived on the opposite side of the continent from her, we saw her as often as we could and corresponded with her regularly. Aunt Ruth was well-traveled, being an employee of Air Canada and also part of a women’s travel organization that took her to the most interesting and exotic spots on the globe. She was also a wonderful correspondent. She always sent letters for birthdays, anniversaries, and just whenever. It was always fun exchanging email with her with the little pictures and cartoons she would add.
Not long ago I 











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